ARE WE STILL SEARCHING, JUST LIKE KING ARTHUR?

My life up to now, (I’m 73) can be characterized by the words ‘restlessness’ and ‘curiosity’. I was born in Liverpool in 1947.  My mother, father and grandfather lived in a claustrophobic, terraced house in Birkenhead, just over the River Mersey. There were constant clashes of temperament between all three adults, although the basic reason was money, or better, the lack of it. When you are 4 years old you just don’t know why the adults are bawling at each other; you just want them to be quiet and peaceful. This situation ended when my father and mother decided to emigrate to Canada, leaving my grandfather behind. I missed him, we loved each other, one reason being that there was a generation buffer between us.

Canada was exciting and free. We moved house at least yearly and often in shorter intervals. After the fourth move I stopped memorizing the names of the roads and often forgot where I was. Even though we lived in Winnipeg, Manitoba, which was extremely cold in the winter, I knew that this was the right place for me. This did not apply to my mother who hated it. It was understandable, being alone all day long, no friends, no family. In the end, we left Canada and returned to Liverpool.

When I arrived back, I felt and acted like a Canadian and could not get used to the England of the 1950s which was a tall order for someone like me. The culture shock I suffered has its traces in my brain up to the present.  There were school uniforms, corporal punishment if you misbehaved at school, and above all, the discrimination within a rigid class system, meaning snobbery. Eventually, I managed to adapt to this new culture, but even now, there are still aspects of British culture which pose problems, although I live in Germany now.

When I completed schooling, I studied at the University of Liverpool and became a teacher. My first job was in London where I taught pupils from India, Pakistan, and the Caribbean. Nobody really wanted them, and since I was the ‘wog’ teacher, members of staff did not want to have too much to do with me either. I met a German student while I was studying in Liverpool, and we married and emigrated (at least as regards myself) to Germany. I learnt German and then completed my M.A. at the University in Bochum, a city in the Ruhr area of North Rhine Westphalia. Later, I was offered a post at a commercial and technical college in Recklinghausen. Although this would appear to be a success story, my constant itch to move around became a hinderance to simply being happy. Up to now my whole life has been a search, and I am sure that I have found what I have been looking for. This is the main artery of my novel ‘The Grail’. Of course, it is not an attempt at an autobiography. The main character has a mind of his own and his actions are, for the most part fictional. Nevertheless, my experiences play an important role in his development.

 

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